facingfear – Melanie Stevenson

The crickets are in full chorus, and, for me, that’s always a sure sign of the approach of fall.

In all its breathtaking beauty, pristine skies, and warm color, fall overtakes summertime, yet I struggle to say goodbye to our Canadian summer. With fading flowers, shorter days, and cooler nights, September will bring with it the new school year and the added challenges due to COVID.

We’ve already seen so much change and made so many adjustments. I’m amazed at our resiliency to face unknowns and navigate countless uncharted routes. How we’ve persevered and continued to try new things is remarkable. How we’ve kept going and reaching for our dreams despite uncertainty or loss is inspiring.

Stepping into new and unknown territory, or continuing forward on the current climb, can be unnerving. We want to know the route in advance, to have all the possible unknowns nailed down, to make sure we don’t get derailed. But in truth, we can’t and don’t have to. All the planning in the world can’t ensure a perfect outcome or ideal conditions.

Being courageous or trying new things doesn’t mean a lack of fear. It means treading forward onto new ground despite fear. It means with every step forward we tramp over fear until we have reached our destination. There may be some detours, some tough climbs, some falling rocks, but we stay the course, undaunted by the fallout.

Don’t be fooled. Trying new or hard things swings the door wide on fear, but what if we renegotiate our thought life and say that fear’s proximity signals we are on the right track? Its arrival means we are stretching ourselves and reaching and learning and growing. We are moving forward, conquering the rough bits, and refusing to atrophy.

Mistakes? Bring them on! They too need to be rewired in our thought process. Our brain will expand through missteps, and we will grow more sure-footed. Mistakes—or wilderness wandering—is often preparation for future treks. Through them, we learn to trust God more fully, we grow in wisdom, and gather more grip for the next hard thing. Wrapped in His forgiveness and grace, and increasing in confidence, we will lunge forward, like a cliff climber reaching upward to grasp the smallest rocky outcrop that seems almost out of reach.

Before we know it, we are challenging others to try hard things or to join us in ours. Then one bright day, we pause to check the map and discover how far we’ve come. We smile because at that moment we realize that although it wasn’t easy or perfect, we scaled the unknowns and arrived. It was worth the climb, and more than that, we are no longer the same as when we began. We are stronger and wiser, and our character has grown.

Somewhere along the journey, fear—overshadowed by courage—became a bystander.

My courageous step forward this fall is beginning to write my third book. Fear is lurking and eager to heap on discouragement. But I’m choosing to believe that it’s a signal I’m on the right track. I’m reaching and moving forward despite imperfections and unknowns. Each written word is a step forward in my climb, my journey, and I trust its completion will be worth the effort. After all, my word of the year is Fearless! And while that may not mean a complete lack of fear, I can definitely fear-less.

As you approach this fall, with its many unknowns and invitations to fear, be reminded that with every step forward, you are not only moving ahead, but also growing, learning, and developing. It’s not about the absence of fear, or fully controlling the conditions, it’s about taking one small and courageous step at a time and enjoying the view.

May you be enfolded by the grace and mercy of the Father, trusting that one glorious day all the twists and turns of your journey will make sense.

“The way we deal with uncertainty says a lot about whether Jesus is ahead of us leading or just behind us carrying our stuff.” ~ Bob Goff

“For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the LORD, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.” ~ Jeremiah 29:11

shutterstock_489435382 When approaching something new we can be so afraid to do something wrong—or be bad at it—that we not only procrastinate, we never even try. We can be paralyzingly afraid to fail. But hear this: you don’t have to be perfect, or the best, you just need to do your best. Even before that, you simply need to begin.

Nike’s tagline was perfect: “Just do it”. We can be immobilized wondering how to start, afraid of all the unknowns, fearful of what others think, and particularly afraid to fail. It takes courage to try something new and step out of our comfort bubble. Though starting is the hardest part, starting over is where the battle is won.

If you fail—good. I mean it. Failure is sooo good. Making mistakes is the way we learn and grow. Failure builds the grit we need to keep us from quitting. Mistakes aid humility, form us into authentic human beings, and fuel compassion for others. Failure inspires fortitude and ensures we appreciate the gift of arriving at our goal. Success is sweeter because of the skinned knees and bruises we received while missing the mark. If we aren’t failing it’s possible we’re too comfortable, or even standing still.

Just because you failed, it doesn’t make you a failure. Quite the opposite. You linked arms with bravery long enough to try something difficult. You reached high enough to be breathlessly uncomfortable. The hard things you dared made future tasks less daunting. Accomplishing the seemingly unreachable made the next challenge that much easier. Through it all, you didn’t allow failure to define you.

So you, wildly gifted you, step out—as often as needed. You don’t give up. Each day you pluck away at one smaller aspect of the larger task. You don’t know exactly how you will accomplish your audacious goal, but the fire fueling the inspiration refuses to be extinguished. In spite of the unknowns, the crippling feelings of inadequacy, and fear of failure, you don’t quit.

Soon you realize that you’ve completed that marathon, decluttered your home, started your own TV show, saved untold lives, raised a house full of kids, are running your own business, have written that novel, and are celebrating decades of marriage. You’re blissfully surrounded by supportive others on their unique journey, and are championing them on theirs. More than that, you’re deeply grateful for everything—even the failures, of which every single one you survived.

All because you showed up, and didn’t give up. You tried when you were tired, and kept on though you worried you didn’t do it well enough, or fully enough, or were the best for the job. You smiled when you could have cried, because you knew its warmth would lend strength to another. Each day, no matter the mountain, you put one foot in front of the other, drawing from a pool of faith and hoping that—by the grace of God—your efforts would compile to make a dint of difference. That somehow you would scale the summit.

And though it wasn’t the end goal, you got acquainted with your true self. You grew to like your own company and recognised that you’re enough. That the effort was enough and that no part of it was wasted. The failures were the fabric of the journey; all of them forming a depth and richness that much sweeter for the mistakes. Anything lacking, all the stumbles and scraped knees, God somehow stitched together with the golden threads of his love.

So here’s to all the times you could have quit but didn’t. The times you could have listened to the naysayers but plugged your ears. The times it would have been easier to remain on your rear-end in the dust-riddled remains of your pride than risk rising. The times you could have retreated but carried on weary and battle worn. Here’s to not letting go of your vision and for having the heart to start in the first place.

And here’s one more encouragement. Think of the sculptor. He sees the sculpture while it’s still a hunk of stone, then sets about the painstaking work to reveal it one chip at a time. One small manageable piece. And think of you: still in formation; bravely chipping away one small task at a time, hewing you closer to the completion of the larger one. Or, as one of my pastors used to say, “Inch by inch, it’s a cinch. Mile by mile it takes awhile.”

Whatever it is, just do it!

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What mountain or obstacle are you facing today? Is it a tangible task, or something you must overcome in your thinking?
Pray for the courage and strength to do what needs to be done today.
Break it into smaller pieces, and tackle one small bit at a time. Show up, do your best, and, just as the sculptor, keep your vision in mind.

Tag: facingfear

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