The Journal Journeys Excerpt #2: God Restores

This week, I’ve taken an excerpt from my prayer journal that refers to a lengthy trial in our lives where we were praying for God’s help and intervention. The prayer records my thankfulness to God.

Through this struggle and many others, God deepened my faith and trust in him. So often He has been my only hope. I have faced countless situations that rose before me like an impenetrable mountain, but God, my great navigator, forged a path and lead me as he has time and time again.

So often I marvel at the way he does this. In the thick of the trial, I cannot fathom the outcome. My emotions bully my outlook. My circumstances appear hopeless. I clutch at my fragile faith attempting to hang on to the truth. Doubts descend, yet God promises to be with me and never forsake me, so why do I fear? And why am I surprised when he works the miraculous?

When I jump for joy and praise God at his answered prayers, is he disappointed with my lack of faith or does he take pleasure in my wonder and thanksgiving? Whichever the case, his love is greater than my fears and faithlessness. His arms are always open. I have full assurance of his unfailing love no matter in which state I come to him.

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And so I keep showing up, keep writing and speaking prayers to the One who wraps me safely in his arms and makes all things not only possible but beautiful in their time. The same God can do likewise in your difficulties.

Bring your impossibilities to God. Release them to him, and watch what he will do.

“With God nothing is impossible.” (Luke 1:37)

Click here to hear me read excerpt #2 “God Restores”

January 31, 2016

Lord,

You are greatly to be praised. You have done marvelous, mighty works on our behalf, so surprized us—I am still trying to absorb how thoroughly you have restored things. Despite all the odds, you alone can be praised for this complete turn of events. It is a miracle—something only you could do.

Thank you for your gentle, lovingkindness, so sweet towards us. Despite my deep disappointment, you remain the same. You don’t change. Your love is not dependant on our behavior. You can handle us being disappointed or doubtful because you were up to something better and know I don’t fully understand your ways.

I’m sorry. Please forgive me for all of that. I thought I had faith, but I suppose it was on my terms, as in, as long as my prayers are answered and things go my way, I’m good. But again I see that you lead us to deeper faith. You ask us to trust you when we cannot see any way before us. Look how you provided so entirely and completely! At every turn, every bleak moment. You gave us all we needed.

“You have done great things; O God, who is like you?” Psalm 71:19

Thank you, Father, for all you have done, the many ways you have tenderly cared for and carried us. You are greatly to be praised! I love and trust you. Thy will be done.

Amen.

Listen to song: Yes I Will

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Our family together on Mother’s Day 2020

Click here to purchase my 31-day devotional Soul Focus

Journal Journeys Excerpt #1 – Greatly Helped

Each of us is on a journey.

Most of the time we don’t know exactly where we’re headed and even if we do, we’re often unsure of how to get there. We often feel lost, lonely, and labeled. Discouraged, disqualified, and disappointed. Worried, weary, and winey. We suffer sadness, setbacks, and sabotage. 

Yet we keep going despite uncertainty. Falling forward. Learning and leaning in, hurting and healing. Holding steady through storms. Yanking back the clouds to eagerly absorb the sun-soaked, brilliant moments. 

Our lives, our journeys, are composed of both the breathtaking and the breaking.

Since becoming a Christ-follower at age 18, I have kept a prayer journal to scribe such travels. The pages have provided me with a secondary outlet to pour out prayers alongside my spoken utterances.

As the years have unfolded, the journal pages provide proof of God’s handiwork, documentation of God’s faithfulness in my life, and in the lives of others, and provide a tangible way to see the countless occasions God has answered prayers.

Even when circumstances seemed utterly hopeless, and when his seeming silence was bewildering, God was still there. Scanning the pages, I see that the no’s were merely delayed yes’s—a hold-out for his best when I would have happily settled for good. 

My current prayer journal

The written wrestlings within these pages—sometimes through tears, often amid doubts and questions as I struggled to know God and understand his ways—don’t declare me faithless or damaged. Rather, they offer assurance that I am a beloved child of God attempting to understand her Father’s ways, to grow closer to him, and to trust and love him more deeply. Thanksgiving prayers soak the pages too, recording the times I’ve been surprised and delighted with the extravagant love of God.

For the next few weeks, I’ve decided to share some entries from my prayer journal in hopes the sentiments may offer solidarity, reverberate inside your own heart, provide a way to express some of your own pleas and desires, and kindle hope. I’m calling this series, The Journal Journeys, and I hope you will enjoy traveling through the pages with me.

I’m certain that reading these prayers aloud will be a vulnerable, intimate, and emotional experience. But I’m hoping they will offer a measure of comfort and encouragement if you are grappling as hard as I am to lay hold of hope and process faith in your journey with God.

The first excerpt I have chosen refers to a season of struggle in our life but seems appropriate to begin with as it speaks to our current situation with COVID-19. You can watch the video or read the entry below. At the bottom of this page, I have included a song for you to meditate on. So looking forward to journeying with you!

Click here to watch The Journal Journal – Excerpt #1

January 5, 2016

Dear Lord,

We have been greatly helped by you. You have not forgotten us. You have made the impossible possible, and have brought us through the hardship of this very difficult time. 

We have not been privy to an explanation as to why. No understanding as to what to do next. No future knowledge except to live each day at a time, one foot in front of the other, moment by moment. 

“You have also given me the shield of your salvation; Your right hand has held me up, Your gentleness has made me great. You enlarged my path under me, so my feet did not slip.” Psalm 18:35-36

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My prayer journal – today’s excerpt

I like the verse above because not only have you saved me, but it shows your continued help in my life. Through great disappointment and disillusionment, your right hand has held me up. You dealt gently with me.

When the way was dangerous, like a precipitous path, you enlarged the path under me so my feet did not slip. You kept me safe. You didn’t whisk me off the path. No, I still had to pass through, but you made a way—you made it possible to pass through. 

And maybe we have passed through now. Maybe we are just coming out on the other side. I can’t pretend to have much of a clue what you are doing, but I feel as though a change may come. 

So now, because you tell us to ask (Matthew 7:7), I ask you to help us—as you have continued to do—to find our way. Help us to be wise, to know what to do, to make wise choices. 

Your will be done,

Amen.

Listen to song: Goodness of God

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12 Treasures I’ve Learned from My Spiritual Mom

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My spiritual mom and I at a birthday celebration with “The Prayer Ladies”.

I call her my spiritual mom. We aren’t linked biologically but through the things of God. She’s been a constant in my life for over ten years, and we’ve shared many conversations and events. Without meaning to, or possibly knowing she has, Nancy has taught me many things. I thought it would be insightful to share these priceless morsels. It may sound like I’m bragging, but bear with me. I’m hoping one or two might be meaningful to you!

Continue reading “12 Treasures I’ve Learned from My Spiritual Mom”