What Kind of Impact Are You Making?

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A precious offering from a student: a reminder of the little hands I held and also helped teach how to print their names.

This past Tuesday, I spent my last day in the kindergarten class. At the end of the day, just before nineteen little humans trundled off for home, I was inundated with colourful masterpieces and priceless hugs. Working to hold back tears, I received their affectionate gestures. The teacher commented on the impact I’d made after being in the class just over a month and added, what if it had been a full year as he had hoped.

It begs the question: what about an entire lifetime?

Within such a lifetime – composed of one day piling on top of another – there exists the opportunity to make a day-by-day, moment-by-moment difference. Some of those difference-making impacts will be the result of a cognitive choice or disciplined action, but there will be many that won’t. Some impacts will occur without you giving them a second thought; the mere result of you being a living, breathing human with the potential to leave an imprint on other human beings, for better or for worse.

I think to myself, what sort of impact am I making? Am I helping or hindering those around me to be the best versions of themselves? Do my words and actions encourage and build others up, or tear them down? Am I using my resources, including my time, finances, skills, and gifts to make a difference, or am I selfishly expending them only on my personal comfort?

Some may not think it matters, but I prefer to think it does. As a child, whenever we visited somewhere, my mom used to instruct us to leave it better than when we arrived. I think that applies to people as well as places. We can leave a person better than we found them. Our exchanges, no matter how small, can leave a positive or negative impact. The ability to shift the atmosphere is ever at our disposal.

It’s easy to grumble about poor service, complain about a coworker to another, treat a server poorly, or lose it entirely. But how much greater is a simple smile, a kind word of encouragement, a well-placed compliment, a small offer of help, a show of affection, or an extension of forgiveness. All of these can make all the difference. You won’t often know the mountains another is scaling in the midst of climbing your own, but at every handhold there exists the opportunity to make that assent just a little kinder and more manageable.

Beyond all this, there’s the impact in eternity, which, though temporarily invisible, will one day be all there is left, and all that matters. Not that we do these things for gold stars. We do them out of the outflow of love and forgiveness that we each have the opportunity to receive and extend. But make no mistake, everything, whether seen or unseen, applauded or ignored, matters.

I’ll leave this last thought: Be the person your dog thinks you are, the person your family wishes you were, and the person God made you to be!

For there is nothing hidden that will not be disclosed, and nothing concealed that will not be known or brought out into the open.

~ Luke 8:17

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  1. In what ways are you leaving people better than you found them? In what ways could you stand to improve?
  2. Look for opportunities this week to make a difference.

12 Treasures I’ve Learned from My Spiritual Mom

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My spiritual mom and I at a birthday celebration with “The Prayer Ladies”.

I call her my spiritual mom. We aren’t linked biologically but through the things of God. She’s been a constant in my life for over ten years, and we’ve shared many conversations and events. Without meaning to, or possibly knowing she has, Nancy has taught me many things. I thought it would be insightful to share these priceless morsels. It may sound like I’m bragging, but bear with me. I’m hoping one or two might be meaningful to you!

Continue reading “12 Treasures I’ve Learned from My Spiritual Mom”

Moving Mountains: or how I was literally brought to my knees.

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Ten years ago I could barely walk, sleep, or carry my own purse. I could no longer drive. That’s how intense the pain had become. I’d been a runner for 28 years. My motto was, “Why walk when you can run.” Now I had no choice. It was nearing two years, and over ten health care providers, but no one could help me. On top of it, I became pregnant and couldn’t take enough medication to dull the pain. It seemed I was trapped in a hopeless situation. Continue reading “Moving Mountains: or how I was literally brought to my knees.”

Strong & Free

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Right before the Canada Day long weekend, along with a sizeable crowd of hardcore people, I completed an exercise challenge called Rebellion. At the party to celebrate our achievement, I bought this t-shirt. The saying on the front resonates with me. The two obvious reasons are that it includes words from Canada’s national anthem (the country of which I officially became a citizen 33 years ago), and secondly, by working out and completing the challenge, I grew stronger and free from indulgences that might otherwise keep me off track. But a less obvious and deeper meaning for me began 29 years ago at age eighteen. Continue reading “Strong & Free”

Thoughts on Forgiveness from a Bitterness Survivor

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It’s easy to have the mindset that if we withhold forgiveness, we are in control and somehow getting back at the person who hurt us. We think, if I forgive them, it lets them off the hook. But holding onto unforgiveness not only allows the offender to vicariously continue to hurt you, studies show it can also make you unwell. When you forgive, you release yourself from the bondage of bitterness. Forgiving not only frees you from hanging onto the offense, it frees you from the offender, and makes room for full spiritual, emotional, and even physical healing.

Continue reading “Thoughts on Forgiveness from a Bitterness Survivor”

12 Things to Stop Doing Right Now

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Every so often, my 17-year-old daughter gives me a wake up call. She’ll say something like, “Mom, you need to stop…” and it can be anything from stressing, to some sort of negative thinking. We need people in our lives to keep us in check. I tend toward the melancholy and appreciate my extroverted, optimistic daughter who dreams big and pulls others along for the ride. In celebration of those who set us straight, I’ve put together a list of 12 things we can do right now to improve our outlook and our lives.

  1. Stop stressing. It’s easy to get caught up in fret, worrying about things that should take a back seat in your life. Instead, put them in their place, last in priority, and let the things that really matter be at the forefront. Don’t waste today worrying about things that may happen, but instead celebrate the gifts in front of you right now.
  2. Stop trying to please everyone. Being a people pleaser can make you lose yourself and your truth. You cannot please everyone. You will get misunderstood. Some may dislike you, some may get angry at you. You will be too much for some and not enough for others. Trying to meet another’s expectations is like running on an endless treadmill. Know who you are, whose you are, and rest in that.
  3. Stop trying to do it all. Being busy all the time will leave you physically, emotionally, mentally, and spiritually bankrupt. Don’t accept the lie that says you can’t slow down. Create some space in your life. Fight for it if you must. Make time to reflect, to breathe, to be. Take time to fully appreciate the moment you are in and that you are alive. Set aside time to be fully present for your loved ones.
  4. Stop trying to be perfect. Perfect is an illusion. Strive for excellence, improvement, to keep growing, to move forward – anything but perfection. You will occasionally mess up. Forgive yourself and keep going.
  5. Stop thinking that tomorrow, the next day, or the distant future will be better than now. Don’t wish away today, with its beauty and heartaches. While it’s great to be optimistic, let’s not throw away our moments. Many moments strung together make up a life. Live this moment to the fullest – aware of your future destination – without wasting what’s in front of you.
  6. Stop focusing on the negative. The good, the bad, and the ugly has shaped you this far – for better or for worse. Recognize the worse, don’t make it a curse. There will always be mountains to climb, but the view up there is fantastic! Beauty and blessings are all around you. Take note of the beauty and count your blessings.
  7. Stop berating yourself. What is your internal voice telling you? If you have a lovely British mum like mine, you know it’s impolite to brag. But a little internal gloating is acceptable. Celebrate the things you are good at, how far you’ve come, and that you’re not the same as you were last week or last year. Forgive yourself for your failings. Make a list of three things you like most about yourself. Look in the mirror and tell yourself, I love you.
  8. Stop thinking you can’t be replaced (hear me out on this one). Thinking that if you left a position there would be no one to fill your shoes can lead you to stay in a place longer that you should, stall you from moving forward in your purpose or calling, and prevent others from the blessing of filling that role. Your position is not your identity. It’s a way you get to help and serve for a time. Be wise to see when that season is over.
  9. Stop comparing yourself or your journey to others. It’s easy to compare your life to another’s when you’re in a tough place. You get to see the polished parts of another’s life. Remember, all that glitters isn’t gold. Everyone has struggles. Your trials are making you a stronger, more 3-dimensional person who can fully relate to others in their struggles. Despite how the rough patches make you feel, if you let them, they will make you more beautiful. You are unique, one-of-a-kind. Your gifts fit your purposes and the time you’ve been given on this earth. Passionately use your gifts and your life, without wishing for someone else’s, and you’ll find yourself so in love with what you’re doing that you wouldn’t trade it for another’s.
  10. Stop believing lies. The cants and the nevers should be out-of-the-question. The Accuser offers a steady diet of whispered lies to wear and tear you down. God’s corrective encouragement offers forgiveness, direction, and hope.
  11. Stop holding on to hurts. Release them and the people who inflicted them. Mercy and forgiveness is your path to freedom.
  12. Stop being afraid to love. Love lavishly, like you’ve never been hurt. Love fully without conditions or expectations. Love for the sheer sake of it. Tell your loved ones how much you love them.

What would you add to this list? I’d love to hear any of your ideas!

Encourage one another and build each other up, just as in fact you are doing.

~ 1 Thessalonians 5:11

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  1. Which of the above do you most struggle to stop? Look for ways this week to face this area head on. Ask God for help to overcome it.
  2. Write down three things you like about yourself. Thank God for how He made you, and look for ways He can use those in your life and for His purposes.