The Journal Journeys Excerpt #2: God Restores

This week, I’ve taken an excerpt from my prayer journal that refers to a lengthy trial in our lives where we were praying for God’s help and intervention. The prayer records my thankfulness to God.

Through this struggle and many others, God deepened my faith and trust in him. So often He has been my only hope. I have faced countless situations that rose before me like an impenetrable mountain, but God, my great navigator, forged a path and lead me as he has time and time again.

So often I marvel at the way he does this. In the thick of the trial, I cannot fathom the outcome. My emotions bully my outlook. My circumstances appear hopeless. I clutch at my fragile faith attempting to hang on to the truth. Doubts descend, yet God promises to be with me and never forsake me, so why do I fear? And why am I surprised when he works the miraculous?

When I jump for joy and praise God at his answered prayers, is he disappointed with my lack of faith or does he take pleasure in my wonder and thanksgiving? Whichever the case, his love is greater than my fears and faithlessness. His arms are always open. I have full assurance of his unfailing love no matter in which state I come to him.

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And so I keep showing up, keep writing and speaking prayers to the One who wraps me safely in his arms and makes all things not only possible but beautiful in their time. The same God can do likewise in your difficulties.

Bring your impossibilities to God. Release them to him, and watch what he will do.

“With God nothing is impossible.” (Luke 1:37)

Click here to hear me read excerpt #2 “God Restores”

January 31, 2016

Lord,

You are greatly to be praised. You have done marvelous, mighty works on our behalf, so surprized us—I am still trying to absorb how thoroughly you have restored things. Despite all the odds, you alone can be praised for this complete turn of events. It is a miracle—something only you could do.

Thank you for your gentle, lovingkindness, so sweet towards us. Despite my deep disappointment, you remain the same. You don’t change. Your love is not dependant on our behavior. You can handle us being disappointed or doubtful because you were up to something better and know I don’t fully understand your ways.

I’m sorry. Please forgive me for all of that. I thought I had faith, but I suppose it was on my terms, as in, as long as my prayers are answered and things go my way, I’m good. But again I see that you lead us to deeper faith. You ask us to trust you when we cannot see any way before us. Look how you provided so entirely and completely! At every turn, every bleak moment. You gave us all we needed.

“You have done great things; O God, who is like you?” Psalm 71:19

Thank you, Father, for all you have done, the many ways you have tenderly cared for and carried us. You are greatly to be praised! I love and trust you. Thy will be done.

Amen.

Listen to song: Yes I Will

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Our family together on Mother’s Day 2020

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Finding Thankfulness

72099801_1240224716149606_8410987073124696064_nThis Thanksgiving—

I don’t want to eat the turkey until full but fail to be filled.

I don’t want to gather with family and friends and fail to connect.

I don’t want to utter a thanksgiving prayer and neglect to be thankful.

I don’t want to count my blessings and not count myself blessed.

What I really need is to develop a thorough kind of thankful—one that spans each day and each year. One that outlasts hardship and withstands the fluctuation of mood and circumstance. A kind of thankfulness that is equally grateful for all that has been given and all that has been taken away. A deep and holy kind of gratitude that acknowledges I have been carried through much and recognizes it is well with my soul.

I understand this type of thankfulness doesn’t come without thought or determined effort. It requires putting away grumbling and complaining, developing a kind of thought fortitude which denies fruitless, habitual patterns of negative thinking. This kind of thankfulness is best developed by a fierce refusal to dwell in the past, releasing all expected outcomes and entitlement, and most of all, trusting God in everything.

72486084_1531083160367940_1117825707628560384_nWhen I am wishing things to be what they aren’t—wishing for situations or people to change—I am unable to focus on the good God has allowed into my life. When I complain about my circumstances I doubt the wisdom and goodness of God who tells me, “…all things work together for good to them that love God, to them who are the called according to his purpose.” (Romans 8:28) When I worry about my future, ungrateful for today, I deny God’s ability to take care of me. It is nearly impossible to be thankful under these conditions.

When I lift my eyes to the heavens, my perspective alters. When I soak in God’s love and absorb his goodness, my attitude shifts. 1 Thessalonians 5:18 says, “Be thankful in all circumstances, for this is God’s will for you who belong to Christ Jesus.” The keyword is all.

72665665_1138435393031985_1173636376688590848_nI can’t just be thankful when things are going well, when I’m on vacation, when I’m healthy, or when I get a raise. I need to fortify gratefulness by thanking God even when I’m working, unwell, or don’t know how I’ll pay my rent. When I can learn to be thankful in everything, I know I’ll have learned the key to thankfulness. Instead of a grumbling attitude, I’ll live out of a heart of gratitude. 

In this posture of thankfulness, I connect more fully in my relationships and am grateful for the people God has tucked into my life. My prayer life is richer when I appreciate all I’ve been given and that all God’s purposes are for good. I can count my blessings and truly appreciate that I am blessed independent of circumstances. I can even eat turkey this Thanksgiving, thankful for a full tummy, a full table, and the fullness that comes from the generous and never-ending portion of God’s love.